The Zombie Apocalypse

I am regularly concerned about the impending Zombie Apocalypse. However, I am reasonably sure that I will be able to survive for a modest amount of time before the raving hordes of brain-eaters finally get me. This isn’t necessarily due to any specialist skills or abilities that I have – my ample frame has evolved to fulfill the “cuddly” niche, not that of the runner. My confidence of a reasonable degree of survival is based upon two factors:

  • (a) I have a reasonable theoretical understanding on how to use a pump-action shotgun, and
  • (b) my girlfriend is willing to help me bury the bodies should the need arise.

Not only that, but I am very happy to say that she is also willing to chop my head off if I start shambling around saying “Muuuurrrggghhh” a lot [offer not valid in mornings, pre-caffeine]. We have been reliably informed that such an offer is tantamount to being married in certain cultures…

So, imagine my surprise and pleasure when I stumbled across Professor Andrew Gelman’s recently published (1st April) paper on methods of surveying the zombie menace. Building upon Lakeland’s (2010) earlier analysis of zombie dynamics and the readiness of the population to this threat, Gelman’s work will enable us to have a better understanding of how far this threat has spread.

Truly, we have never been better prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse!

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